Diary for a Visit

I have nowhere else to post this. God knows why a diary should be something that has to be posted somewhere, perhaps I just crave attention. Whatever the reason, here's today's post - my first official post.

The evening was setting in, but the June wind still carried the heat from the day as I looked up. The colours of the taped flowers were drained and blunted; the light wasn’t highlighting their brilliance and never would. With the bold force that was stolen from the flowers, the sound of broken glass crunching underfoot broke any silences.

I could see notes amongst the flowers, but I don’t remember what they said anymore. I read them in earnest but when my eyes looked away the words faded from memory.

The glass tried to glisten in the headlights of passing cars, but it was dulled by the solitary shadow of Big Tom. He stood away from us, looking from a different angle. His presence could never be ignored.

Tom stood tall, mature, Big. Arms folded, his eyes marbled and glazed while his mind raced and stopped simultaneously. He didn’t move. While my face was sticky from tears blown dry in the warm breeze, Tom’s was unchanged.

The group cried around me, some of the boys were comforting their girlfriends and some comforting each other. I stood alone, floating between groups before standing with Olivia.

I know Olivia least, but we hugged tightly for a moment between pulls on her cigarette. I’ve never known such sadness amongst adults; I’ve never seen my friends cry.